Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes Biography

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So, it’s someone’s birthday. What do you write in their card other than the proverbial “Happy Birthday?” Yawn.
Nothing works better than the gift of laughter. So spread a little joy with these funny birthday quotes and make your loved ones’ birthdays unforgettable.
These Happy Birthday quotes are guaranteed to remind ‘em of their majestic existence...
"“Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.”
"“Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.”
"“People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.”
"“Age is a number and mine is unlisted.”
"“Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.”
"“Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.”
"“My wife hasn’t had a birthday in 4 years. She was born in the year of …………. Lord-only-knows.”
"“About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.”
"“For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.”
"“Inside every older person is a younger person – wondering what the hell happened.”
I love quotes and sayings and I know many others do too. So I’ve gathered a bunch of funny happy birthday sayings and quotes on age, just to give you a smile or two. With all that’s on your plate, I thought you’d appreciate something light…
Funny Happy Birthday Sayings
“Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.”  Author Unknown
“A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.”   Robert Frost
“I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.”   Phyllis Diller
“You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.”   Bob Hope
“For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday.”   John Glenn (Astronaut)
“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. You look like a monkey, and you smell like one too.”   Children’s birthday song
“Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.”   Ogden Nash
“Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.”    Rev. Larry Lorenzoni
“The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.”  H. Prochnow
“Why was he/she born so beautiful. Why was she born at all. Because she had no say in it. No say in it at all.”   Children’s birthday song
“I believe in loyalty. When a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it.”   Eva Gabor
Funny Age Sayings (Birthday or not)
“After 30, a body has a mind of its own.”   Bette Midler
“The first hundred years are the hardest.”   Wilson Mizner
“You grow up the day you have your first real laugh yourself.”   Ethel Barrymore
“Looking fifty is great–if you’re sixty.”   Joan Rivers
“The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything. “   Oscar Wilde
“Pleas’d look forward, pleas’d to look behind,  and count each birthday with a grateful mind.”   Alexander Pope
“It takes a long time to grow young.”   Pablo Picasso
“Getting old ain’t for sissies.”   Betty Davis
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”   Mark Twain
“Some people reach the age of sixty before others.”   Lord Hood
“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.”   Mark Twain
“Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.”   C. Joad
“Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternatives.”   Maurice Chevalier
“The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left.”    Jerry Wright
“Oh to be seventy again.”   Georges Clemenceau, on seeing a pretty girl on his 80th birthday
“The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune.”   Pope Paul VI
“The best substitute for experience is being sixteen.”   Raymond Duncan
“The secret to eternal youth is arrested development.”   Alice Roosevelt Longworth
“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”    Abraham Lincoln
Two tips on your birthday:
1) Forget the past, you can't change it.
2) Forget the present, I didn't get you one.
Money's tight
Times are hard
Here's you friggin birthday card
You would have loved the gift I didn't bother getting you.
You're another year older and another year wiser
So put your brain to work and figure out there ain't no gift for you.
You're older.
You're wiser.
You're sophisticated.
You're far too mature to be concerned with material things, like presents.
There were a lot of famous people born on your birthday. Too bad you aren't one.
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
So many candles... so little cake.
Birthdays are like boogers, the more you have the harder it is to breathe.
Some words of wisdom for your birthday, "Smile while you still have teeth!"
With age comes wisdom. (You're one of the wisest people I know!)
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
Don't think of it as getting older, think of it as becoming a classic.
Another year older, none the wiser.
Count your blessings, not your wrinkles.
I'll always think of you as someone older than me. Happy Birthday.
You know you're getting old when you walk up the stairs and call it excercise. Happy Bday!
Not just a year older, but a year better.
Here's to another year of experience.
Just like fine wine, you grow better with the years.
Happy Birthday to someone who is forever young.
You're not getting older, just more distinguished.
Because you're you, I'm celebrating today! Happy Birthday
You're older today than yesterday but younger than tomorrow, Happy Bday!

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom

Funny Birthday Card Quotes For Friends For Men Form Sister For Brother For Girls For Dad For Women For Boyfriend For Husband For Mom